Thursday, September 03, 2009

the last night

This is the last night. We take the youngest of our six beautiful, wonderful blessings from God, to college in the morning. How is it possible that he is 18 already...... How can he be going off to college already..... How has he changed into a man in front of my eyes.....without me really seeing it? And yet....the memories come .....I did see him getting taller.....I did hear his voice getting deeper.....I did see his impish grin turn into a charming smile....I did see him running faster, jumping higher, swinging harder....I did buy him bigger shoes.... But it happened so fast. I could not take it in. And I could not hold on..... After tomorrow, it will never be the same. He enters a new world....a new world of challenges, of making decisions, of new friends, of new responsibilities.....and I cannot go with him. Oh, my heart will go with him........ but my eyes won't see him every morning. I won't be able to kiss him goodbye every morning. I won't be able to ask him every afternoon: "How was your day?" I won't be able to wish him good night every night, as I go to bed and he stays up later. No, the time to let go is suddenly....and finally....here. It is time to give him his wings. The nest is empty. It has been a long, wonderful, marvelous journey. It is time to turn the page. I knew it was coming. But I could never be ready....it came in a blink. Once there were two. Now we will be two again.